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Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Give It Up

I've recently been taught yet another life lesson in giving every circumstance up to God, thanks to Emily.

My daughter, Emily, has always been on the very petite side. I lovingly refer to her as my little peanut. She is nearly 11 months old, but she could easily pass as 8 months. She is just so tiny.

As a result of her slow weight and small stature, we scheduled a doctor visit to check for any underlying medical conditions. I was suspecting the doctor to laugh and say that I had nothing to worry about. Instead, the doctor proceeded to ask a birage of questions and sent us for bloodwork to rule everything out. Not the response I was expecting.

As a mother I wanted to hear that nothing could possibly be wrong with my daughter. That's not what I heard. My immediate response was to worry.

But God is oh so good. He immediately started working on my heart. Through this experience and many others, God is slowly teaching me to release my worries to Him.

Matthew 5:31-34 immediately rang loud and clear in my mind, "So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

God has a lot to say about worry. Primarily he says not to do it. Ever. When I worry I'm not trusting Him. Being stuck in worry says that somehow I can control the situation better than He can.

But in that moment I took a step back to remind myself of Who He is. He spoke the universe into being. He created human life from the dust of the earth. He is all knowing, all powerful, and all present. Those truths are enough for me to trust Him. In so many ways he has proven Himself faithful to His promises. I can trust Him.

God sent me a few other reminders about MY daughter too. That was just the reminder, that she is not as much my daughter as she is HIS. I am an earthly vessel, gifted with the great responsibility of caring for her and pointing her to Christ in this lifetime, but HE is her Father. He had good and perfect plans for her long before she even came into being. He loves and comforts her in ways that I am not capable of. I will fail her, but He never will. She is not mine, but His.

His voice calmed my spirit. He took my burdens upon himself and I felt light as a feather. He alone holds tomorrow in His hands. Worrying about the future will not change the perfectly laid out plans He has for me or my daughter. What a relief. Not only did I let go of worry, but I found joy in doing so. What great joy in knowing that He had and always will have everything under control. I have nothing left to do, but trust Him.

"Worrying is like a rocking chair, it gives you something to do, but it doesn't get you anywhere."


Heather said...

oh that quote again >.>

hope emily's ok x